When Meaningful Change Takes More Than A “Strong Mindset”

I have been thinking a lot about change this week. Change in my own business. Change in my own life. Change in the simple things, like seasons.

In the personal development world we’re constantly saying things like, “The only constant is change,” which is, of course, true. But not always helpful. If the only thing constant is change, then how are we supposed to face it? All too often coaches will tell you the answer is to have a “stronger” mindset. Be “tougher.”

“Make it happen.”

But the truth is, beloved, that meaningful change doesn’t just require just a “strong mindset.” It also requires a strong heart – one that is willing to open itself to feel all the grief, all the disappointment and all the frustration that comes with beginning to truly live.

In the Christian tradition this is often referred to as “our brokenness” – the place where deep suffering and deep joy meet. But so often, instead of feeling broken open to feel all that the world has to offer we just feel broken. Not enough. Stuck. Unworthy. Lazy.

In truth, when we are broken open, we are at our most radiant. We receive and reflect the most light.

Yes we feel pain. But we also, underneath the initial shock of feeling so much at all, we begin to feel JOY. We begin to feel LOVE. Even though nothing has changed. Even though the world is a mess. Even though we can’t stop making the same mistakes over and over and over again. We begin to feel joy.

And that, beloved, is the power not of being “tough” but of being true. Not of being “strong” but of being willing. Not of “forcing” but of allowing.

And believe it or not, it is the best way to create ANYTHING – to open yourself to truth. All of it. And keep moving forward in love.

Always,

Caroline

 

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